Barriers~

Everyday we either create barriers, run into barriers, or erect barriers, In all aspects of our lives. Be it physical, emotional, personal, psycological, or spiritual barriers. Be it the gate of a building, a door slammed shut in our face, the stamina we have which restricts the distance we can run, the difficulty to convey a simple msg to a a certain someone, to think the way we should think, or to have that perfect relationship with GOD. We are facing barriers constantly. Constantly we are fighting the barriers, if there is one, with the strength that we can muster. Sometimes we overcome, sometimes we don't. Sometimes..... Somewhere in Jurong Camp, 3 DSMB S1 branch, someone is fighting to break down the barrier between officers and his men. That psycological barrier which keeps the men from interacting too much with the officer. The psycological barrier which keeps the officer from interacting with his men. That someone, is on the verge of breaking the barrier which seperates each other from each side of his own wall. On the other hand, a barrier is emerging elsewhere. Somewhere in Ayer Rajah Camp. The same someone is fighting the strong emergence of a barrier where once everyone were roaming freely on the plains, interacting with one another. The barrier is getting stronger. The someone is losing the fight. His strength is not sufficient. He is now seperated from the rest by a wall. A wall that can only be broken from both sides......

This week is one fast paced week with me sleeping at like average of 12am...(that is very late in my terms) Cos of the packing and the busy schedule that i have this week. So happy that i met with Seng and Uncle Hong yesterday, although it was our 2nd meeting in 3 weeks, we had alot to talk abt. Something Ah Seng said struck me yesterday, about "hi-bye" friends. I did a little self reflection yesterday and realised that i have quite a lot of "hi-bye" friends. Maybe because i have erected a barrier around my self unconciously, unknowingly........maybe... Then today leh, got sonic fest:) Heard planetshakers live first hand. The music and worship was awesome. Will be going down tomolo and sat again to catch their worship. Meanwhile, still busy shifting house and this weekend will be the milestone weekends as i will actually be staying in my new house from this weekend onwards!! So excited abt it:)

By the blink of an eye, its Aug. Its been 4 months since i've commissioned as an officer. One and a half more week before my S1 comes back from maternity leave. It means time to step down, and take responsibilities of a normal 2LT. NO more stand in S1. The experience was definitely fun and enriching. However since now my S1 will be coming back....means more arrows will be shooting. I did the shooting when she was not arnd. Now, i'll be one of her targets.

A Different Perspective~


Another one of those Sats burnt~ dunno how long this will continue. Shifting house is a painful process. Especially with those DIY stuff. My dad and i have tasked ourselves to paint our new house. Its painted already, we just wanna add a finishing touch cos the developer obviously chao keng and left it in an unpleasant state. Trust me, painting A house interior and exterior is not an easy task...especially when there's only two pple, and so 2 days over the weekend to do it. Besides, that, there's drilling for fitting all those cheap and good IKEA furniture and accessories that we bought. Absolutely fantastic:) PLus, there's the moving of all our current furniture from our new house to our old one. Well, thinking from one point of view, its shitty sai kang. From another, fun workout to build muscles and stay in shape:)

I drove a van today, and i was entirely excited to drive it. Because firstly it was a different vehicle apart from those i usually drive. Secondly because its big!! I feel like im the king (tortoise) of the road when i drive it. Thirdly, its the 3rd stick vehicle that i have driven so far. Im fascinated with stick vehicles....the changing of gears just make driving so much more fun, the ability to control the vehicle, just as you want it to. Total control. My mum always said that for manual cars u control the car. For auto, the car controls you. Drivers should noe what i am talking abt here. I personally find it true.~

My next target, driving a motorcycle. Unfortunately, i can only learn when im 21. Cos officially when one is 21, they are absolutely free to decide on thier own religion, not restricted from their parents objections. I guess the rules for other things should be applicable as well.:)

Those who are patient enough to read my post, i thank you and congratulate you!!...be it reading it with a mirror or...i dunno how else u can read it?!~...How abt this for a different perspective?:)

Hungry~

Hungry I come to You
For I know You satisfy
I am empty but I know
Your love does not run dry

So I wait for You
So I wait for You

I'm falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus You're all
This heart is living for

Broken I run to You
For Your arms are open wide
I am weary but I know Your touch
Restores my life

So I wait for You
So I wait for You

If we accept adversity,Enduring every pain,Then we will learn what we should know;Our grief will turn to gain. —Sper

Safsa~ The team which helps me destress from work:)

Companionship~

"This court sentences you to 9 months in detention....."
"This court sentences you to 5 months in detention for the first charge, and 5 months in detention for the second charge......"
"This court sentences you to 7 months in detention....."
"This court sentences you a $600 fine.....do you have any problems paying it in full?"

It was a great experience sitting through a court marshal session. It's like going to court only thing that its a scaled down version and the pple sitting"up" there are wearing uniforms and not wigs. My heart skipped when the Court Panel President finished his last sentence. It was like..."this guy is one harsh ass****" for the first 3 sentences to the first 3 accused. Then, when it was our turn...it changed to "thank God For him!!" Relief. Something that started bad(it shouldn't have in the first place) but ended on a good note. Everyone was happy, and i thought Sean did a good job writing out the mitigation plea and did an equally good job by reading it out confidently. Anyway, Sean is one confident guy. I could see relief from Peh's face. I could hear relief from Peh's wife. I myself thank God for the grace he has given to us. The grace he has given to Peh. It was all over. Peh can finally get on with his customary marriage plans and he is soon a father to be. It is so nice to see how loving the couple is....

Thinking to myself, when will i ever reach that stage?(ya noe getting married and stuff) As some of you might noe, i have been telling ya'll that when you reach your twenties, you start to think differently. My goal is to get married before 30. That is something not really unrealistic. Considering that pple out there are getting married when they are 20, even being a father or mother.(Welcome to the REAL world).So counting back, i guess you'll need a few years to noe ya gf well enough to marry her, so let's take that as 4 years. Assuming i wanna get married when im 29(worst case senario liao) that means i'll have to noe her by 25. Well, in courting there will always be ups and downs, so let's say another 2 years to get to noe a realli realli nice girl. That's 23. And that's the worst case senario. We noe the maths:)

Only on Monday i was talking to one of my clerks Ah boi Kwek abt Companionship. Citing the example of the SMU student and the Airforce DXO. i told him, "ta1 men2 ke2 yi3 zhe4 me4 zao3 jie2 hun1, shi4 hen3 xing4 fu2 de4........"

Bad Day??

It has been a great day:)

Fishing~

"Fishing is not about catching fish. Its about developing relationships."
Many people think that fishing is a waste of time, spending the whole afternoon in a boat, or on a stool, waiting for the fish to bite. Recently i tried to fish during JCC, using a make shift fishing rod created by myself using the stem of a plant which resembles "mini bamboo" Sharil, my brune-ian friend and Ex Chillhermit(the one they dump u there for 5 days to survive.) buddy "fished" with me on Sungei Batuk Apoi for 2 long hours using only quail's intestines as bait as we could not dig up any worms, to no avail. Then, fishing was ABOUT catching fish.

"Why is it so hard to love those who are closest to us?"

"Why is it we know the least those we love the most?"

Pls comment:)


Eph 6:1-4
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 'Honor your father and mother'-which is the first commandment with a promise. That it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on earth. Fathers, do not exasperate your children; Instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."

The Living of my new house~
Fine Friday~

Literally. I got a parking fine, for which i still think i do not deserve. The senario was like this: I was to meet Jan at East Coast Park hawker centre for some terrific Sinapore food before she flies down under today. My car was parked in position. The image of the URA parking signboard saying 50 cents for every half hour flashed in my mind vividly. I bent over to the left side and pulled the vehicle compartment open. Damn. No more parking coupons. I looked around. The carpark was packed to its capacity with no sign of another fellow driver going to move out. Time was 1925 hours. Mmm...parking attendent at east coast park on a friday evening? I don't think so. I locked my car, strolled to the park bench facing the sea, and admire the aeroplanes fly by in the dark blue sky as they make a routine attempt to land at the all time busy Changi airport..........

"What's that noise?" It was after dinner, we were on our way to see my new house.
"oh S***" It can't be. My heart pounded as i glanced to see that there was a little paper fastened to my windscreen by the wipers. I slotted into a lot by the side of the road. Walked out......my heart sank. It was unmistakable. The familiar long thin strip of paper which i recalled that i got not so long ago. Haiz...for the rest of the journey Jan called me a "fine" gentleman. Ok. It was sort of wrong for me to assume that the parking attendent won't come. It was also wrong of me not to go attempt to get a parking coupon from someone or somewhere. But the intent of putting it was there....However intent is not good enough. People can say, people can argue, but can people put into action what they say? Alas, action speaks louder than words. Will the Panel and prosecutor actually care about what Lt Sean, the defending officer has to say in defence of Sg Peh? Will Sg Peh's action of getting caught in possesion of illlegal items already decided his fate? It is ultimately the action taken by the panel and the prosecutor that will seal Sg Peh's future. In my opinion, there are roads of Sg Peh's fate. One, a simple fine and he can go on with his life and get on with his marriage plans. Two, a short term in DB, a black mark in his record. I really hope that Sg peh can get away with a fine......

It was indeed, a Fine Friday.

A Sunset in one land is a Sunrise in another
Always look on the bright side of life!

Mayhem

The word that describes it all. The NKF saga, the late nonchalant reply from the prosecutor, the sooo many choices of lights, and the busy schedule that awaits next week.....

3000 over pple withdrawing their monthly donations to the NKF. From the fact that their money could be fueling something else rather than the needs of kidney patients alone, i can hardly see why. However, the argument is that the CEO has contributed alot to the organization and has done things unimaginable. He has MADE THE DIFFERENCE. Is withdrawing donations an act of impulsiveness from the public?For me, i think twice whether i wanna withdraw my monthly donations. It is not about him i think about, it is abt the patients. Ok, u can say that this is all bull s*** and a load of crap. But then the question is, how is this saga going to change the charity scene in Singapore? Will Singaporeans become less charitable as a result? I do really hope that if Ah Kow withdraws his donations to NKF, he will put it into another charity. In that way, the net total donated will be the same. Singaporeans will still remain as charitable. Who are the real losers in this? For me, it is not the CEO nor SPH nor you donors out there who feels like you've just been cheated big time. For me, it is those who needs the money most who have lost the most.

Porno and pirated stuff were involved. There was more than 5 pieces and hence I had to seek for advice from Legal Services(the legal department in the SAF) on what to do with the serviceman.(He got caught in possession of those items by the MPs) That happened almost 2 months ago. Today, politely i sent an email to the prosecutor in charge and he nonchalantly tell me that oh....he is scheduled for court marshal next wed...... WOW. No advanced notice, no instructions on what to do, no info no nothing...It was 5.15pm. To make things worse, my chief clerk had to get to her antics again and started getting worked up and concerned over this issue of procedures we have to follow up blah blah blah.....Racing through my head was a single tot which went "sheesh...got enough time to prepare everything necessary? tomorrow got safsa open and pds meeting...next week got inter-formation, mes family day meeting, AHM training.....by Wed, need to choose defending officer, need to get the documents ready....how??" So little time.So many things to settle. Time by Hamon Well....5.25pm. The bochup side got the better of me. Packing my bag, locking the office, getting the clerks to lock up the area, i stepped out of the office, and made my way out of camp, totally not thinking abt the issue, leaving it only for tomolo...leaving the worries to tomorrow. Besides, tomorrow i should be able to think more clearly, more concisely, more efficiently.......

There was a last min change of instructions and me dad and i went down to IKEA to get some lightings with me mom. It was wierd fer me, wearing army uniform walking around, getting frequent looks from pple. But if ya noe me, i don't really give a s***. Anyway, i was bedazzled as we walked into the lighting section, and i got really confused trying to look at all the lights, trying to see which one is nice and fitting.(Literally blinded by the light.) And then my mom and dad got into one of their usual conversations......
" eh how abt this one?"
"What are you toking abt??!?#%#$&....this one too long lah....so short, i want one hanging one"
"Darling ah...wait. Darling!!....see Hamon....ur dad always like that one...always walk off never wait for us..."

Now my head is really spinning..........


Make A Difference

Won't you Lord, Take a look at our hands
Everything we have, use it for your plan
Won't you Lord, take a look at our hearts
Mold it, refine it, as you set us apart

We want to run to the altar
and catch the fire
to stand in the gap between the living and the dead
give us a heart of compassion
for a world without vision
We will make a difference bringing hope, to our land.

$600,000

What can one do with 600,000 dollars? The options are limitless. You can buy a car, a piece of land, live off it for the rest of your life, etc etc. For me, i would give 100,000 to charity, give another 200,000 to buy love, joy and happiness, if they can be bought. And the other 300,000 to support me for the rest of my life. Would buy a farm somewhere and live off it for the rest of my life. What a happy ending......
What would YOU do with $600,000?

15-13 10-15 16-17 was the jaw dropping score which i played with Aaron today in the SAFSA open singles finals. We played for about an hour or so, and it is fer me one of the best singles game i played for a long long time. I could endure the long rallies, could return almost all the shots that came, albeit some which went out, and i could get into offence and attack my way through. Seriously, after losing the 2nd set, i almost wanted to give up, thinking to myself that i would not be able to last the 3rd. To give Aaron credit, him being himself, he was making all sorts of mistakes that allowed me to gain points.The feeling of being able to play like my old self is exhilarating. It has been an agonizing 3 years. Like what my OCS wing sergeant major would have said, " Now, u r a caterpillar, a MAGGOT. But soon, you'll be able to FLY like a BUTTERFLY!!!! The time will come, soon. But not yet. Only God will noe when the time is right.

Money is not the root of all evil
The LOVE of money is.

The Recent S06C Gathering~

Lovely~

the word that describes my weekend:) It has been a really lovely weekend, a weekend that is sooo fulfilling, so energizing and so well spent. Playing guitar for Prayer and Praise at BRMC on friday nite. Yes folks, fer me, anytime after 1730 hrs on friday is considered weekend. The weekend mood just starts from there. Even on friday itself im already almost on weekend mode..just have to wait for the job to be done, and the various routines to go through and hellooooooooooo Weeekend!!Continuing, painting my new house on Sat morning, it was a hot, sweaty, painty sat morning. Went out for lunch and a movie with a junior in the afternoon. Wactched fantastic 4...it was well...not say fantastic, but reasonable for $9.50. Then at night went to Civil Service Club for dinner, where i met the BOTAK pin(his head not so pin-nish after all, more like eggish..no offence:) Then today leh, church, dota, more painting, and finally to end the day had a lovely outing in IKEA, where we bought many many things for the new house. My weekend was really squeezed to the max, rushing here and there to meet friends, do personal stuff, having dinners, continuing the daily routine....but it was totally cool and enjoyable. I just hope that every weekend i have can be so fruitful. and to top it off, Today is Payday:)

My clerks tell me that i have alot of patience. Patience with my chief clerk, who has the loudest and longest burp i've ever heard, who never fails to act blur in times of need, and act smart in times of....no need. Who takes forever to close a simple window on her computer, who is ever sooooo worried abt every small little things. Patience with a-boi kwek, who is very computer illiterate, trying to teach him how to operate microsoft word and excel to do simple tasks and documentation. Patience with.....a particular clerk, who in my other clerks opinion, is trying to "play" with me.

In 3 weeks, i have only seen this guy 3 times(or something close to that). He seems to have the ability to fall sick almost every other day, and find reasons not to come to work. Because of certain reasons i tolerated his antics until now. Now, my patience is running thin. In my opinion, i have been too nice, too lenient, and too soft-hearted as an officer. I have never questioned my clerks when they ask me for leave or when they report sick. So far, none of them have abused that trust, except this one. I think the other clerks have given me respect for the respect that i have given them...ya noe, mutual respect. i trust them, they trust me. My patience is running thin, and i am going to take action pretty soon. If i do not take action, the respect that i have gained from my other clerks will vanish into the thin, cool air.........

Typical day in S1 branch

" Yap ah, help me file this"

" James, are u able to help me check how many pple failed their BMI and gimme the figures and percentile? send it to me in softcopy. Thanks"

"Kwek! still doing Routine Orders? wah lau eh...3 weeks here already leh..why like that?"

" Ted, eh...where's Ted ah??"
"Sleeping in the innovation room lah sir..."

"Jeff, help me collect something from DIV okie?

"Karnan!?"
"Sir, karnan never come again...RSO.. he think he going to ORD can play already..we also can play with him..."

"Ma'am ah, ke2 yi3 bang1 wo3 cha2 yi4 xie1 dong1 xi1 mah1?"
......... "Ma'am??"
"BBBBUUUURRRRRRRPPPPP!!"
"#$^#&$%#%#$!$!!"

Today did not feel like a typical day at all. In fact, it was the most fun and exciting day i ever had in S1 branch. It was not the usual routine at all, with most of the pple not arnd. I myself wasn't around in the morning till around 10, rushing back from SAFSA OPEN only to realise that my email account just crashed, for the 1st time in history. The floodgates have opened, and mail poured into my account after 2 days of inactivity. To add to the misery, Uncle Hong send me a nice little(in bytes not really) game.Was wandering around the office for a gd half an hour, waiting for the problem to get fixed.

The most non typical day today that happened was that we made a new branch movement chart. For the benefit of those who don't noe what that is, its a chart which monitors whether you're in camp or outside and why. Jeff, Yap and i took pride in doing the new chart, and when it was done, i looked at it with great satisfaction and a sense of achievement. After being in S1 branch for almost 1 and a half months, i finally made a difference, aesthetically speaking. Not implying that my branch looks like ur storeroom or sumthing like that, but well, something has been changed. How about a small little step for army transformation for you? :)

Change is imperative in an ever changing environment

26 Sandilands Road

Unlike the transformation from a 2G army to a 3G one, this change may not be necessary. Indeed, it will take place nevertheless. For the better, for a newer, for a CHANGED lifestyle and a breakaway from routine, at least for a while before it becomes routine eventually. I just would not believe that after 13 years of serving me well, i am going to part with something that is part of me. Something that is my haven of refuge, my place of solitude, my dungeon, my hideout, my cave, my den, my nest, something that i call home. It is amazing how things changes so fast, and for all i noe the above mentioned could be my new home in just a couple of days. I am both feeling excited and at the same time reluctant as i will be leaving my comfort zone. So watch out folks, i might just be dialing your number in maybe a month or 2 inviting you over for my house warming.

Changing for an ever changing environment

LIVE
talking abt patience.

1. Enduring COA's speech for transformation to a 3G army at the indoor stadium for close to 3 hours. Butt aching but fulfilling. Spine bending but enriching. Wondered even how in the world would someone be able to stand at the podium and talk for 3 hours abt army transformation and LIVE, an acronym for something but dunno whether its classified, so better not mention here, just in case my ass gets busted. Was discussing with my fellow officer Sean abt COA's tenacity and determination, standing there giving the speech. His answer was " he ain't got 2 stars for nuthing"
2. I have never waited soooooooo long to play a badminton game b4. There was interclub badminton today and SSC was playing Mayflower. We had to wait 2 hours b4 the players came...wouldn't wanna get into the details of it. but yeah. that's the crux of the whole thing. Machiam we waiting for Kings. While waiting for our games to start, we played among ourselves, i partnered Marcus and we played against Soon On and Lionel. Also, i had time to teach Macey some Chem. Sheesh, it was when i realise how long i've been away from the books and from A levels. Everything, well almost, was a blank. I just hope what i've told her is not so far from the actual thingy.

Being an officer has certain power which i have yet to discover, till now. I just gave instructions to my clerks this morning that they can go off at 3. As long as they've completed their work and all. This power is not something that i have gotten used to yet after being an officer. " I can give off one ah?" will come into my head. Its just feeling quite wierd, especially with S1 power, but not with S1 rank and seniority. I guess i will have to get used to it, and maybe cherish that power while i have it.......

With great power comes great responsibility, with great responsibility comes greater extras.....

A. C. F.
For my christian friends, nope that doesn't stand for American Christian Fellowship or any other christian fellowship.
Sometimes i just wonder is there life after 5? Judging by the meeting held by my S3 today (it's operations/trainings officer), some pple just ain't have the life after 5. Well, todday was a long day.......... 730am to 930pm. 14 hours at work. i can't believe im spending more time at work than at home. It took great effort for me to sit quietly in that seemingly uncomfortable chair in the conference room not to fidgit too much and fiddle with my pen, silently protesting that hey guys...im still an NSF ya noe...and so are the few here. Our working hours clearly states 0730 to 1730.Haiz..but then again, part of me says that i shouldn't complain. Some pple have to stay in ya noe. Then again, staying in is sort of a blessing...spend less, save more, sleep more.....
It was half past 10 when i stepped into the house. Thinking to myself again, about working life. Will i be like my S3 when i grow up(sound so immature right...), working OT and stuff? To me, the drive to continue to work and work and work will only come from the need to support my family, the need to survive in this fast paced world that we are living in.
Tommorrow, it will be another long day. With a LIVE workshop in the morning, (Leadership/Learning, Image/Identity, Values, Experience) followed by Army Commander's Forum in the afternoon at Indoor Stadium followed by the inter club tourny vs Mayflower at St Margaret's. It will hopefully be a repeat of the last result.
Patience is a virtue....

Newer than e New kiD oN da block
Hello, this is totally new fer me... but i guess i'll get the hang of it, and soon pple will start to be able to read all kinda nonsense and corny stuff that i put on this page.
Anyway, today was the finals of the AVIVA open. I just have something abt AVIVA. their big yellow banners all over the indoor stadium with that cool blue AVIVA word printed nicely on it, their "AVIVA" fans wearing the bright yellow AVIVA shirt,the little girl sitting at the back of me and aaron making so much noise and constantly hitting aaron's head with tt AVIVA yellow balloon thingy, and of course my AVIVA insurance policy. The one which i bought during my BMT, afraid that something will happen to me during army. The salesman was like telling us "....and u noe ah this guy...." "and that guy...." "serious injury..." " he died..." still can remember i was pretty freaked out... Back to thee point. it was a thrilling 6 hours at the indoor stadium, with top class badminton players playing badminton at its very best. Its SOOO amazing how the players move and retrieve the shuttle and hit it with such power and speed. Analyzing my current standard and my current training "regime", i'll be able to attain their level in.......a zillion years. The badminton circle and scene in Singapore has definitely grown bigger over the years, with alot more pple coming forth to watch the tournament, more sponsors, more advertisements...and more support. More importantly, more youngsters picking up badminton. After losing touch from reality due to the fact that i was busy serving my nation in national service and hence the badminton lay off for over a year, i realise that there are alot of new faces that i have not seen before in the game. Its only 1 year man...makes me feel soooo old. Nvm...as long as the heart and soul remains young. It's wat's inside that count It realli heartens me to noe that the sport in Singapore is doing realli well. Maybe in 2012 we will realli be able to make it to the thomas cup finals...Mmm..maybe.